the breeze at marine parade

It’s freaking windy over here at McCafe. My hair is in a total big mess. Azizah just witnessed my most crestfallen look ever on earth. Alone here with my macbook, trying to watch youtube over a cup of Mochaccino. But damn, my eyes are super swollen and they sting, tears invariably fall whenever they sting, and my nose is runny due to the stingy feel. But thank God, I haven’t met anyone from hall here. I think I look kinda scary with my swollen eyes and red nose. Yah, you get the picture. Luckily, I brought my specs along with me.

Today, my entire family isn’t home. Parents went on a cruise trip, Brother’s working and Sister’s out with friends. I didn’t bother coming out of house till I finished doing all the household chores.

Right here at this moment, I’m trying to reminisce the wonderful memories of Marina Barrage when I went there with JC clique to celebrate Clare’s birthday!

I’m too lazy to upload the other photos of the Marina Barrage. I miss the good old days of secondary school and jc. I miss playing badminton. ):

Alright, going back hall soon!

htht sessions with mom and sis

I’m thankful for the numerous htht sessions with mommy and sister.

Hopefully my family stays the same.

I’m freaking scared.   ):

sick of crying everyday

My eyes are perpetually swollen, a result of everyday’s crying.

I don’t understand why people like to vent their unnecessary anger on people who are NOT the cause of it. Is it because I look like I CAN UNDERSTAND every single stupid issue that people are going through? I HAD ENOUGH of all these stupid things. I hate being ridiculed or being bullied unnecessarily because I do not look like I will ever be angry? To be honest, I have never enjoyed a single moment after exams (with the exception of jc clique outing), be it in hall or home. I thought things would be better with family. It turned out that bad luck follows me like a shadow. Damn it, I fucking hate the passing days except the ones out with my jc clique at the Marina Barrage. I feel so trapped by all sorts of bad memories. I wish exams were eternal. I want to be cleansed of all bad memories – they follow me like plague wherever I go. My head hurts so much from all that crying and my eyes are so swollen that I can hardly see my screen. Childish it may sound, I wish my heart would die so that it could be spared from the pain.

I just want to remove that damn mask, all that facades in life, all those hurtful words and all those lies I’ve come across. It’s such a pain to live my life. Today, I saw another side of life. Poor can be rich too. I wish I was spiritually rich – so that I can live life happily and not be bothered by stupid people. I really so much wanted to help society.

But who’s there to help me? My spiritual level is dying soon.

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Have I?

 

Did I just dropped into the same trap?

It’s the same vicious cycle – being happy and getting upset.

I think my heart is settled for Korea, almost for real now.

It feels like the last.

I think I’ve been relaxing far too much after my 2nd last paper. Went out to JP with Le Zung after we ended COM204. Arghs, COM204 was a sucker, and I didn’t finish the news writing section. I’m going to be so freaking dead for COM204. Nevertheless, COM204 is history, hopefully it doesn’t return to haunt me.

HL214 (Urban Culture Asia) is THE LAST paper! I have Thursday till Sunday to study for ONE paper. So I went out shopping like crazy and met up with my close friends. Had so much fun at Orchard with the girls, only managed to reach home at 3am after taking the stupid long night-rider. Nevertheless, we all really had loads of fun gossiping! VANNIE, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU OKAY! Anyway, met Joyce and Shi Ting at Orchard Central! HAHA, Shi Ting has a paper on Monday too!

Woke up really early to meet Louisa at Starbucks today. Supposed to discuss HL214 but we ended up chit-chatting! Then, I made my way down to Orchard to cut my hair. ALRIGHT, my fringe is like super duper fugly now and it makes my face even rounder than before. I’M SO FREAKING UPSET. Geez, why did I even want to cut my already-short fringe?

AAAAARRGGHHHHS, KILL ME!

 

 

On a lighter note, PHUKET HERE I COME (the day after 30th nov!)  (: (: (:

Time To Love! (TTL)

 

 

S I C K

 

Sick – Fever & Headache.

Mentally sick too.

It’s 31 degree celsius now. Feeling warm and humid, roomie and I decided  to camp at the study room. It’s a free day for us to study COM204 which ironically, can never be studied as it is. So right now, I’m spamming youtube like crazy on favourite videos on Korean pop music videos, Lady Gaga, Jam Hsiao, etc.

I’m anticipating my phuket trip with you guys. While most of you will finish today at 3 or 3.30pm, remember, I’m still trying to get by COM204.

 

On a random note, this world really, is a world of mean people.

It’s okay, I do understand.

Tired.

 

physically tired.

mentally tired.

 

i just can’t wait for 30th nov to come,

or maybe not.

宁愿爱 一点不剩

你是好人 也是个坏人

对我坦承 只为了朝他狂奔

不能放任 所以放了

这点痛我还能忍